I really am happy!

 With my due date fast approaching I have time to think about things. You will usually find me complaining about the discomforts of late term pregnancy, but in all reality I am very happy. Actually I feel more blessed than just happy. Happy is when you find 20 dollars on a road, or your favorite pair of jeans is on sale, or the sunset is extra beautiful. Happy, although very nice, is ordinary. It doesn't take much for everyone to find something they could be happy about. Even a person lacking something in their life could find one thing to be happy about. State of being blessed is different. It's beyond "happy" in many ways. Blessed means that you have received gifts beyond ordinary. It means that you, and only you have been given something that is extraordinary. Of course there are many things that people could be blessed with. Some people are blessed with winning a lottery, some are blessed with peace in their life, some a blessed with good health. I have been blessed with my husband and my kids.


  As I look down on my protruding belly and watch it shift from side to side I realize how special my gifts have been. I have been given the gift of a wonderful man to be my husband and together we have been blessed with four kids. Yes, life does have its' difficulties, and challenges, but the blessing I have received is something that simple day to day troubles can't erase. I do grumble when I have to change sheets in my 3 year old's bed because he had an accident, or when my daughter throws a fit, or my almost 10 year old fights to get his math done. I do get mad at my husband forgetting about important appointment, or when he ignores me while watching sports. I do complain about my swollen feet and achy back and the fact that in 2 days I am 40 weeks pregnant and this baby has no intentions of coming out. But all these things can't remove the overall felling of highest happiness, or feelings of being truly blessed.

   There are people everywhere that would give anything just to find a soul-mate like I did. There are parents who struggle to have a child, or feel the heart ache of not being able to carry a child to full term. My soul aches for them. If I was the king (or queen) of the universe I would decree that everyone should find that perfect someone to marry, and that they would be blessed with children that are born healthy and happy. I would really want everyone to have that, but I can't. All I can do is appreciate how blessed I have been and how special the gifts given to me are.

    As I watch my husband sleep next to me all I can think about is how happy I am. His face is the face of my happiness. Seeing his face brings me home. And I see this same face in every one of our children. Every one of our children is a little me and a little him mixed in a big pot of family love. I really can't wait to see that same, familiar face in my newborn. There was never any doubt in neither one of us that we wanted children. Having children was something that we planned and discussed, but we really didn't feel it until our first child was born. The love evolution that a parent experiences after their child is born can't compare to anything else. It's the ultimate state of being one with the universe. The world is not perfect, but for that fleeting moment everything becomes right with the world. And the moments of pure happiness come often with children in the house. Just like right now, as I sit here typing this and I stare at my husband in deep sleep and feel this new life inside me; the life that we created. I can't help but think that this was what Buddha was after, what was the core of teachings of Jesus, and what great poets of the world tried to capture in literary pages. I am very happy! No, I am blessed! Nothing could be more perfect than this moment!

Happy Thanksgiving to all our friends in US!