You loose sleep over what???? part 1

Girly Monkey helping her little friend in dance class

   People are often very curious about the way we do things and we get many questions from many different people. There are 2 questions that people ask us most often. The first question that we get asked a lot is about homeschooling. Now, I know what you're thinking! You're probably assume that we get asked about the logistics of homeschooling, or where we get our curriculum from, or how we handle math and science, but you're wrong to assume that. The question that we're asked the most is "What about socializing your kids?" For some reason most people assume that homeschooling your kids means having them locked away from all contact with other people. I am not the only homeschooling parent (and yes, us homeschooling parents do talk amongst each other and exchange information) that has come across this. Others have reported everyone from close relatives to strangers in the store being concerned over homeschool kids not having enough "social time". Many non-homeschooling people assume that the main reason for sending kids to school is to be with other kids. Wait a minute ... I thought that the whole idea of sending your kids to school was so that they could get education.
Somebody correct me if I am wrong, but I have always thought that this was the goal of school. Somewhere, down the road, we have started to associate school with hanging out with friends as opposed to learning. How do we get back to perception that school is a place to learn and get an education?

Having fun with cousins

   I am all for making friends in school, but my primary objective as parent is to provide my kids with education. If my main goal for sending kids to school was to make friends then I am short-changing my kids. This is especially so, since most friends kids make in elementary school will not be their life-long friends. Most friends that we keep for life tend to be friends we made living close together, in college or university, or through work. As people become parents they tend to make friends with other parents. Friendships are ever shifting and changing, and very few people stay with the same group of friends for life.

Bowling with soccer friends

   So having acknowledged that people's concerns are not due to homeschool kids missing out on starting their life long friendships in grade one, maybe they are about homeschool kids not being able to practice friend-making skills. For the most homeschoolers that I know that is not an issue. Our kids are part of many activities, many clubs, as well as we're all part of homeschool support groups where our kids meet up.Our kids play outside with other kids, we take them to parks and playgrounds just like any other parent. Our kids play with cousins and family friends too, so the concern over homeschooling kids not having enough exposure to other kids is not a valid one.

Funky Monkey being part of the soccer team

   Well, maybe people are concerned over homeschool kids not having full 8 hours of contact with other kids. My question is who put a requirement of time that kids need to be around other kids to be considered "healthy". I can now see every parent saying to themselves "20 minutes of sunshine, 40 minutes of physical activity, 10 servings of fruits and veggies, and 8 hours of being around other kids and my children will grow into healthy, strong adults". Let me be the first one to say more is not better.If that was the case then all kids in boarding houses, youth detention facilities and any other institutions where they are around other kids 24/7, would be better adjusted than kids who spend less time with their peers. I would prefer my kids had a quality visit with a friend or play with some kids outside than have "required 8 hours" around kids.

Playing with cousin

Little Monkey spending time with
a friend

   OK, I am running out of possible reasons that people would be concerned. Possibly it's because they assume that homeschoolers only "do things" with homeschoolers (as if that was bad thing) and are not exposed to variety of kids from different groups. I can't speak for all homeschoolers, but my Monkeys are part of many different groups and clubs and they have contact with both homeschooling kids and with kids who attend regular schools. My kids go to the same swimming pool as your kids, they play on the same soccer team, they dance at the same studio. Many other parents might not even know that we homeschool and assume that Monkeys go to school. It's not that we're ashamed of homeschooling, but rather that we don't feel the need to advertise it all the time. My kids are homeschooled but that's not the only thing that defines them. Often times the conversation doesn't even come up because there are so many other things to talk about. So the assumption that homeschool kids are sheltered in unfounded.

Out for pizza with soccer friends

   So why are people so concerned over homeschool kids not being "socialized"? I think it's because many people don't know much about homeschooling except from what they learned from movies and books about olden days. No worries, things are not like they used to be. Very few homeschoolers live on large farms miles away from other people anymore. Many of us live right in your neighbourhood, surrounded by parks and fields where they play with local kids. Living far away from others enough to be a concern of not being around other people is really the thing of the past for most of us. So next time you meet a homeschooling family don't ask if our kids are "socialized" but rather ask how we do it, if it's easy, or if our kids like math or science. We're much more talkative on these subjects.
   Tomorrow, find out what is the other thing people ask us about!!!